For some totally unexplainable reason, I kept thinking about raising a cat or even a kid these days. Maybe my biological clock of fatherhood is starting to kick in these days. Still, I am very conscious about the responsibility, consequence and trade off of having something to raise, and consciously decided that this is probably a bad moment to do something like that. Call me selfish, but I am still not ready to give up my freedom for raising another life,
A friend was complaining about the cold treatment from some old friends as he didn't get the enthusiastic response he expected for his homecoming trip. My take is like, first of all, he goes to his hometown frequent enough that it isn't such a "precious thing" seeing him coming back. Then, he has a tendency to show up only when he needs help from the others. (I, by contrast, don't look for the others even when I need help.) Friendship is a two way street. You can call it utilitarianism, but the among of effort to pay on sustaining a friendship usually equals to the treatment you received. It's just fair. Just because you show up in front of some old friends doesn't necessary mean that they have to treat you like prince. I know it because I experienced something similar when I was younger. You might complain how cold heart your old friends are, until you start walking on their shoes later, and found that you don't find as much enthusiastic about some old folks who suddenly pops up in your busy life.
After all these years I learned to set my expectation really low and don't bother expecting much from people in general.
Still, precious the friendship you have right now right this moment. Stop craving about the past, and don't expect too much for the future. Just work on what you have right here, right now. As a thirty something, I am old enough to be pessimistic about human nature.
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